I’ll Choose Kindness, But There Are Still Jerks In The World

The thing about kindness, it’s simple, but it’s not always easy. I’d love to sit here and say that choosing kindness is a warm, fuzzy choice every single time, like picking out a marshmallow from a bag. But life isn’t that straightforward, and—let’s be honest—sometimes the marshmallow is stale, or worse, there’s no marshmallow at all. Instead, there’s someone cutting you off in traffic intentionally and not for reasons that they’re rushing to the hospital.

There are jerks in the world. It’s a fact as sure as gravity and taxes. People who, for reasons known only to them, seem to go out of their way to ruin the vibe. You’re standing in line with your coffee, minding your business, and suddenly someone is yelling at the barista because their soy milk isn’t foamed just so. Or you pour your energy into being collaborative at work, only to have someone take credit for the thing you built with your blood, sweat, and brainstorms.

In those moments, choosing kindness feels like the last thing we want to do. We want to roll our eyes, maybe throw a little sarcasm into the mix, or, if we’re really being honest, take a page out of the Hulk’s book and smash something. But here’s where the tricky part comes in, that’s where kindness actually matters most. Not when it’s easy, but when it’s hard. Especially when it’s hard.

That doesn’t mean we’re some Zen monk who never gets ruffled. Far from it. But over time, we’ve realized something liberating, kindness isn’t about the other person. It’s not about whether they deserve it or even notice it. It’s about us. About the kind of person we want to be. Because here’s the kicker—the world’s jerks don’t just make us mad, they have the power to make us like them if we let them. And that? That’s not a road we want to take.

What I mean by that is - kindness doesn’t mean being a doormat. You don’t have to let someone walk all over you to be kind. Boundaries exist for a reason and enforcing them can be one of the kindest things we do—for ourselves and others. The goal isn’t to ignore bad behavior or excuse it, it’s to respond in a way that doesn’t drag us down to their level.

Sometimes, that response is walking away. Sometimes, it’s a calm, firm statement like, “Hey, that’s not okay with me.” And sometimes, it’s silently choosing not to let their negativity dictate our mood. It’s not about proving a point or winning an argument. It’s about deciding who’s really in control—you or the jerk.

Choosing kindness in a world with jerks is kind of like gardening in a climate where weeds are inevitable. We can’t stop the weeds from popping up, but we can choose not to let them take over the garden. We pull them out, plant something beautiful in their place, and keep tending to it. We do it because it’s worth it, because the alternative—a life full of bitterness and thorny resentment—isn’t what we want to cultivate.

I don’t know about you, but I’ll choose kindness. Not because it’s always easy, but because it’s always worth it. And for the jerks? Well, I hope they find their way to a better place. But until then, I’ll keep pulling weeds.